Liberating Our Better Selves:
A Lesson from Nelson Mandela

by Tom Terez

During his 27 years behind bars in South Africa, Nelson Mandela became a father figure to many of his fellow prisoners. He spent hours lending an empathetic ear and providing wise guidance.

It may have been his most important role ever -- and he set an example that can benefit us all.

Many of the political prisoners spent long days pounding rock in a limestone quarry. They were allowed just one visitor every six months. Letters from home were so chopped up by the camp censor that the paper often fell out of the envelope in shreds. The guards used threats and beatings to enforce a long list of dehumanizing rules.

When the prisoners could talk privately, their conversations often turned hateful as they voiced their contempt for the guards, the warden, and anyone else even remotely responsible for the raging injustice of apartheid.

Nelson Mandela listened. He certainly understood. But he refused to let hatred rob his friends of their emotional freedom.

We will leave this prison one day, he would frequently tell them. But if our hearts and minds are filled with hate, we will be taking the bars with us. Our hatred will imprison us for the rest of our lives -- and keep us from building a new South Africa. We must learn to forgive and reconcile.

Mandela lived his words during a history-making presidential term from 1994 to 1999. His warm smile, bright outlook, and deep wisdom are living proof that he left any lingering hate back in the cold cells of Robben Island and Pollsmoor Prison.

What about you? You're not in a literal prison, thank goodness. But are you in a self-made prison of quiet animosity directed at someone who did you harm? Are you carrying the weight of a grudge? Are you stuck in a pattern of passive-aggressive action that's all about subtle revenge?

These are difficult questions, but honest answers can help us unlock the way to our full potential.

"The first thing is to be honest with yourself," President Mandela has said. "You can never have an impact if you have not changed yourself."

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Tom Terez is a speaker, workshop leader, and author of the book 22 Keys to Creating a Meaningful Workplace. Visit him online at TomTerez.com, BetterWorkplaceNow.com, and InnerBest.com.

Copyright 2007 Tom Terez. All rights reserved.